So I realized it has been a long time since writing on here. Many things have happened over the course of this year. But, I found myself missing this. So here goes.
The Good and the Bad: Thankful
Two Words..... Christmas Break.
I love it most of the time because I get more time with my kids. However, with that being said there are days like yesterday. Days that have me questioning what kind of mother am I. Days that try my patience, that have me stressed and worn. Lets just say I had my coat on and was ready to head out for some much overdue me time when my wonderful husband came walking in the door. He noticed the coat right away and bid me farewell with a kiss.
Granted it was only to the grocery for a few hours, but it was me time. No wiping toddlers, breaking up fights, kissing boo boos, or hearing Mommy on repeat. It was beautiful. Walking down the isles with just my cart and myself, taking my time deciding on which brand to get.
I found as the trip went on I became much more relaxed, breathed easier, and found God speaking to me. Encouraging me that I can do this.
By the time I got home I couldn't wait for those little arms to wrap around me, enveloping me in their warm hugs with wet kisses. I had missed them. Huh. So even on those days where I feel like a failure of a mom, one that questions if I have shown enough grace, loved on them enough, given them enough encouragement I am loved. Not only by the God who gave me these precious kiddos, but BY my kiddos. It seems that no matter how the day goes, it always ends with "I love you Mommy."
It also doesn't hurt to come across things like I did today. This letter was one that Brooklyn wrote at school and I just uncovered from my pile today. It shows me that even when I am lacking, God never does. He takes over and helps lead me. For that I am thankful.
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